Spam, Duo, and the Medicine Bears
by GideonRynn
Summary: Good general sillyness for your tastes. The Boys are stuck in a safe house and everybody's come down sick. It's up to Duo to make a cure. But when the cure turns Quatre into a... tiger... personality... something... and RELENA shows up... madness ensues.
1. Default Chapter

WARNING: This is a fic assuming that Duo sucks at cooking or manually making something edible... but I'm also planning to do one where he rocks at it! Poor boy deserves it =:( Spam is the little specter at the back of my head that just decided to appear to bug the heck outta me. He typically doesn't exceed five words per stupid comment, but if he exceeds five words, count on it to be something specifically detrimental to my image.  
  
{What image?}  
  
See?  
  
{No, really... tell me.}  
  
OK, anyway, Spam and I attempted to MST a fanfic... perhaps Crow, Mike, Tom will show up if I piss them off enough.  
  
{Gideon. Image. Tell.}  
  
The results were, to say the least, for your amusement.  
  
{The least is right.}  
  
[Shut up! WE haven't even started yet, you apparitional freak! Go sit in your corner, Spam!]  
  
{Make me}  
  
[::sighs:: Here we go... it's a little weird how we came up with this. You can say that at times I'm writing it, then at other times Spam is writing it (unfortunately), and then other times it's... outta thin air.]  
  
1:45am  
  
{I did that.}  
  
Duo: ::shakes a bottle of.. something, trying to prepare... something...::  
  
[Could you be any MORE specific?]  
  
{Damare, bone bag}  
  
::all of the doors have been locked, bolted, and blocked with amazing efficiency. the telephones are missing from thier dusty places, the windows have been taken out and replaced with heavy, durable metal, and as a result, any light that plans to enter the mansion hideaway has had it's plans... spoiled...::  
  
[Oh brother...]  
  
Duo: *She's the diamond of the desert, she's a golden mountain spring* ::stops, opens the top of the bottle and pours said bottle contents into a blender, then presses the [7] button::  
  
[::suspicious:: Spam, what's he making?]  
  
{Hell if I know}  
  
[Should we stop him?]  
  
{Probably}  
  
Duo: ::hums, then smiles maniacal smile when he presses the stop button, the odd mix of said bottle contents continuing to whirl in their shimmery blue-green colouring. he pours said contents back into the bottle and takes a whiff of it. gags unceremoniously:: Blech, that's horrible! ::immediately sunny smile takes over his face:: But that's what the directions say...  
  
[What directions?]  
  
{Hell if I know.}  
  
[::eyes apparition warily:: That sounds stupid, Spam, stop it. *What* did you leave him to find?]  
  
{Heck if I know.}  
  
Duo: ::lifts bottle and literally hops up the steps:: Anyway, all medicines taste horrible, so this should do just fine.  
  
[SPAM!!]  
  
{It's your fault}  
  
[What?!]  
  
{If it kills them}  
  
[::horrified::]  
  
{::grins slowly::}  
  
Duo: *I believe I'm the same... I get caaaaried away....* ::takes a deep breath, then slams the first door open:: Ohayo gozaimasu!! Wakey wakey, Wu- chan!  
  
Wufei: ::moans:: G-go aw-w-way.... AH... AHHHHHCHOOO! ::rubs nose with the back of his hand and pulls the cover over his head, shutting his eyes firmly because if he opens them the world looks like it does from the Orbiter ride at the fair::  
  
Duo: :tsks, waving his index finger, one eye closed:: Ah Ah Ah, Wu-babe, gotta get up now. ::grins broadly and holds up the bottle and a spoon:: Time to take your medicine!  
  
Wufei: ::opens right eye:: What?  
  
Duo: ::shakes his head:: He can't even hear straight... gotta hurry and get this stuff down his throat... ::sets stuff down, rubs hands, then picks stuff back up and advances on Wufei::  
  
Wufei: ::opens left eye:: NO... ::thinks back, tries *hard*...::  
  
~~~~~~~shimmer backflash~~~~~~~~~  
  
Quatre: ::is slumped on Trowa's upholding body, looks terribly sick. in fact, both of them look sick!:: Duo, because we can't afford someone recognizing us somewhere and leading them here, we'll need *you* to make something for us...  
  
Duo: ::violet pupils roll up until they meet his eyelids in an absolute motion of bewildered kawaiiness::  
  
{Your brilliant concoction, ne?}  
  
[NO. You put that there!]  
  
{Spawned from *your* brain, baka.}  
  
[Oh, so you're invading my brain now? NOt FAIR!]  
  
{Poor baby.}  
  
[No, poor Wufei! I don't know how to save him! Except... well DUH, I'm writing it, ne?]  
  
{What a loser...}  
  
~~~~~backflash far from the end~~~~  
  
Wufei: ::crestfallen:: Oh no...  
  
{Will Duo succede in giving Wufei the poison? Will Duo kill Wufei? Will Wufei kill Duo? Will Heero show up and kill them both before any of this insanity can continue? Tune in Next Time to: Days Of Our Gundam Pilot's Lives}  
  
*A song I heard off of some commercial... it's probably screwed up lyric wise*  
  
*By... S.. S.. Saaasami ::nervous laugh::  
  
{Splendor, you blockhead}*  
  
Well, that was the teaser, if you got this far. Part one will come some time in the future if I haven't gotten a clue and stopped by then. Buhbye!  
  
  
  
Wufei: Shiiiimata! What have I done?! What an absurd idea!! WELL, I'm *not* going to give that baka grounds to kill me on.. ::wraps covers tighter over him:: Go away, Maxwell. I'll cure *myself*.  
  
Duo: :annoyed:: Just open wide! It'll take only a minute! Geeze, you'd think I was handcuffin' ya or somethi--- ::suddenly, Duo's mouth freezes in mid-speak to form in a wide, disturbing grin. a plan, strange, and just as disturbing, formed quickly in his mind::  
  
Wufei: ::disturbed by the lack of pysco-babble outside of the safety of his covers, blinks a couple of times:: Maxwell?  
  
::silence::  
  
Wufei: ::peeks out of the covers a little:: Hey.. where are.. you...?  
  
Duo: HIIIIIIIYAAAAAAAAAAAA!!!!!! ::leaps on top of the covers where Wufei is supposedly cringing, grabs his wrists and handcuffs him before he can retaliate. he straddles him and laughs maniacally:: Sugoi! I pinned the Great Dragon!!  
  
Wufei: ::mouth drops open:: W-whaa.... HEY, UNHAND ME! ::suddenly glares at Gideon and Spam:: No. No. NoNoNoNo...  
  
{What's wrong?}  
  
Wufei: You're planning something weird, aren't you?! Something that'll have Heero beating me senseless for if he finds out, right?  
  
{::shrugs:: Beats me.}  
  
Duo: ::shakes his head:: Now you stay *here*. I have the feeling that you'll be the worst to convince to take the medicine simply... ::thinks a moment, then a steady gun flashes through his vision and he shudders:: Nevermind. Make it next to last. You sit tight until I get the other guys to take it.. then I'll come *right* back! ::gets up and leaves the room with the death-bottle and a spoon::  
  
Wufei: ::blinks, then violently begins to pull and twist:: I've GOT to get out before he gets back!!  
  
::unfortunately, to Wufei's discomfort, him shaking the bed has knocked over a bottle of chibi sock puppets that look like the Teletubbies., and they fall on his stomach and move an inch from his face*::  
  
Popo: Hi!  
  
LaLa: Hi!  
  
TinkyWinky: Hi!  
  
[::sweatdrop::]  
  
{I did that too}  
  
[::horrified:: My God, how could you be so cruel?!]  
  
{You have no idea}  
  
All: Let's play a game! Let's siiiiiiiing! ::begin to rock side to side and hum, then break into song::  
  
THIS IS THE SONG THAT NEVER EEEEEENDS  
  
YES IT GOES ON AND ON MY FREIIIIIIIIIINDS  
  
SOME PEOPLE  
  
STARTED SINGING IT NOT KNOWING WHAT IT WAS  
  
BUT THEY'LL CONTINUE SINGING IT FOREVER JUST BECAUSE  
  
THIS IS THE SONG THAT NEVER EEEEENNNDDDSS  
  
Wufei: AAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!  
  
::knock knock:: Quatre?  
  
Quatre: ::looks up tiredly, then slinks to the door and opens it. he looks at the perfect physiology with envy:: You haven't caught it?  
  
Duo: NOPE! But it's time for you to take your medicine, so sit down. You shouldn't be up and moving anyway. Sit down and I'll give you what I've made. ::he sits Quatre down, then sits down beside him, the takes the bottle in his hands::  
  
Quatre: ::when Duo pops the cork on the bottle his heart skips a beat. a bad feeling creeps up on him and he looks at the top of the bottle from which toxic-looking fumes have begun to rise. he bites his lip:: Duo, have you tested that stuff?  
  
Duo: Nope. ::swirls it around, then gets out the spoon and pours some on it. little does he notice that the spoon his slowly melting:: But I'm sure it's fine. Here, taste it.  
  
Quatre: ::both eyes fix on the strange-looking concoction, and he gulps. he doesn't want to take it, but he's too nice to refuse such an earnest effort on Duo's part. He opens his mouth while Duo pours it in. He swallows it easily, then blinks::  
  
Duo: ::anxious:: So how is it?  
  
Quatre: ::static::  
  
[Not the static thing again... ::bites her lips:: I wonder if he's ok... not the static..]  
  
{That's a bad sign.}  
  
[I noticed]  
  
Quatre: ::blinks:: Ur...? ::cocks his head at Duo, then a slow smile comes to his face:: Goooooodd....  
  
Duo: ::sighs, but not qutie with relief, because he notices acutely that the air around him and Quatre has suddenly changed... he looks in his eyes and sees something amiss:: Q-dude, are you ok?  
  
Quatre: Purrrrrrh... ::licks his lips, then grins as two short, furry tiger ears pop up at the top of his head. he leans toward Duo and his eyes widen:: Gooooood...  
  
Duo: ::pales:: Good grief.  
  
Quatre: ::pounces on Duo and wraps his arms around his waist, then attaches his mouth firmly to Duo's neck and begins to suck::  
  
{Spam, you're disgusting}  
  
[Did you say something?]  
  
Duo: ::pales:: Ahhhh!! Quatre, stoppit! Q-eeee, ooo, stop, hee hee that tIIIIckles, mmm, g-goooohh, QUATRE, LET ME GOOOooooooOOOOhhh! ah, mmm, q- quit! ::pulls free, then slides to the door and quickly gets out, slamming the door behind him. he locks it and slumps to the ground:: Oh nooo... there... I've got to tell... oh NO, this is gonna cost me...  
  
~merely minutes later~  
  
Heero: ::is busy using the crowbar to find a crack in the metal windows. his eyes are blurry, his hair is more of a mess than usual, and whenever one of his hands is free the fingers twitch as if pulling an imaginary trigger on a gun:: So you locked us in so we wouldn't escape...  
  
Duo: ::defeated:: Ah ha..  
  
Heero: ::grunts as the crowbar slips and tries again:: .. thought the medicine would work..  
  
Duo: Ah ha.  
  
Heero: ... turned Quatre into.. something... and now we have no way out.  
  
Duo: Ah ha.  
  
Heero: ::stops trying:: Ah.  
  
Duo: ::mouth drops open:: All of this happens and 'Ah' is all you have to say about it?!  
  
Heero: ::pauses:: Duo no baka.  
  
Duo: Nothing new...  
  
Heero: ::glares:: Omae o korosu. ::pauses:: But after we get out of here. Maybe.  
  
Duo: Heh heh...  
  
Heero: You didn't even leave yourself a place to get out?  
  
Duo: ::ashamed:: No..  
  
Heero: Then we'll have to bust our way out. After we find the others. ::hesitates and glares at Duo:: You didn't give Trowa and Wufei anything, did you?  
  
Duo: Nope, didn't get that far. Although.. I did tie Wufei up.  
  
Heero: ::cocks eyebrow::  
  
Duo: He would have escaped if he had heard anybody yelling and woulda grabbed that freakin sword of his. I'd like to remain intact through this, you know...  
  
Heero: ::grunts:: Let's go get him first.  
  
::reluctantly Heero and Duo quietly make thier way upstairs to Wufei's room. It's creepy because the room where Duo locked Quatre is very, VERY quiet, and there's silence coming from Wufei's room too::  
  
Duo: I figured that he'd be yelling for me to un-cuff him...  
  
Heero: Shhh.... ::takes a stance and slowly opens Wufei's door. he looks for a minute, then blinks::  
  
Duo: What's wrong?  
  
Heero: ::undetectable smile and undetectable pity:: look for yourself ::he opens the door the rest of the way::  
  
Wufei: ::static::  
  
Duo: ::gasps and runs and jumps on top of Wufei, trying to shake him awake:: Wufei!! Wufei, say something, man!!!  
  
Wufei: ::slightly unstatic:: This.... this.. is...  
  
Duo: .....?  
  
Wufei: ttthe... song that.. never... ends.... ::giggles:: Yes it goes on... and... oooooon my friends.... ::giggles, then laughs maniacally, kicking and pulling at his cuffs like a little kid:: Some people, STAAARTED singing it not knowing what it was, and they'll continue singing it FOREVER JUST BECAUSE, THIS IS THE SOOONG--  
  
[Spam, you destroyed him!!]  
  
{Heh heh}  
  
[Well, I'm going to save him!]  
  
{Not bloody likely. Look.}  
  
Wufei: WEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE! ME WANT TO PLAY! ::breaks out of his cuffs and glomps Duo. the grins at him:: Let's play!  
  
Duo: Heeeeeeeeeeeelp!  
  
Heero: Be quiet! ::looks sharply out the door::  
  
Duo: ::squirms as Wufei's face get's closer:: He's sick! He needs the.. ::sweatdrop:: heh heh, I almost forgot..  
  
Heero: Be quiet. I'll be right back. ::slips out the door::  
  
Wufei: ::rolls his eyes:: He no want to play. me play! Duo play! Let's play!  
  
::grrrrrr.....::  
  
Heero: ::slowly backs into Wufei's room. There's Quatre, slinking toward him, kooky tiger ears twitching, drool coming down the side of his mouth. And right behind him is Trowa. Two new pointy tiger ears atop his head. Eyes fixed on Heero. Drooling. And a bite mark on his neck:: Duo. We have a problem.  
  
Duo: A normal Sherlock Holms! Wufeeeeeeei, let me gooooooo!  
  
Heero: ::step back. step back. step... forward to slam the door shut::  
  
::two thumps promptly sound on the door as Quatre and Trowa yowl to get in::  
  
[Oh, this is horrible. I think I'm going to have a headache]  
  
{::laughing maniacally:: Isn't that funny?}  
  
{Will Quatre and Trowa get in? Are they vampire tigers? Are they just plain... weird? What do they want with Heero and Duo? ::heh heh:: Will Wufei become the fifth Teletubbie? Will Duo become the sixth? Will Gideon combust before anything else happens? Tune in next time to "Days of Our Pathetic Gundam Boys Lives"} 


	2. Here Comes the Cavalry

Wow! I can't believe it! Somebody read it! ::bows low:: Thank you, oh esteemed ones! Minna, Chrono, okya... Anyway, as you wish, another really kinda short REALLY crazy chapter of SPDMBs. Enjoy, you!  
  
  
  
SPAM, Duo, and the Medicine Bears - Part 2  
  
[Um.. Spam?]  
  
{What.}  
  
[Why is it called the Medicine BEARS if Trowa and Quatre turned into TIGERS?]  
  
{......}  
  
[That doesn't make sense, you know]  
  
{It's F.I.C.T.I.O.N. Who cares?}  
  
[Where are we, anyway?]  
  
{Quatre and Trowa are about to kill Duo}  
  
[What? Hunh? ::shifts through all of the crappy material they wrote:: I don't see that!]  
  
{Freakin A, onna, look for yourself}  
  
Wufei: ::cackling wildly, grabs his katana and stands in front of the door:: Stand back, Heero! I'll take care of them, baby!  
  
Heero: ::sweatdrop::  
  
[::sweatdrop::]  
  
Duo: ::sweatdrop:: Good grief.  
  
Quatre: ::mews:: C'mon, let me in!  
  
::silence::  
  
Quatre: ::pets door:: Please?  
  
Duo and Heero: NO.  
  
Quatre: ::pauses:: Erm.. pretty please?  
  
Duo: ~_^ NO. WAY. You're acting weird.  
  
Quatre: ::pouts:: Am not.  
  
[He's NOT supposed to pout! What are you, an idiot?!]  
  
{Is that supposed to be a question you're asking me or yourself?}  
  
[You! You're destroying Quatre's image!]  
  
Quatre: ^_^;;  
  
[You're destroying MY image!]  
  
{I can see Quatre's image... but I still can't see yours. If you just SHOW me what image you're talking about... just a  
  
'little'.. ::pauses when he sees Gideon's face:: Uh oh. I see smoke.}  
  
[::brain smoking:: GAAAAAAAHHH! HEERO, DESTROY HIM!]  
  
Heero: ::sweatdrop:: I can't. He's an apparition.  
  
{ ^_~ }  
  
[::eye twitches::]  
  
Trowa: ::pulls off ears for a minute:: Are these costumes supposed to be itchy?  
  
Wufei: ::throws down sword and crosses his arms:: I will NOT continue! This is degrading!!  
  
Duo: ::snickers:: Who's the baka now, hunh?  
  
Heero: ::glares:: You are. You're the reason why we're in this mess anyway.  
  
Duo: ::mad:: You guys TOLD me to make you medicine, and THAT'S WHAT I DID! I could have JUST AS EASILY  
  
made it to a store or SOMETHING and gotten SOMETHING for you but NO, WE don't want to risk being  
  
NOTICED when NOBODY around here freakin' KNOWS US ANYWAY!  
  
Heero: Precautionary measures.  
  
Duo: That resulted in Quatre and Trowa turning into mad-psyco vampire-tiger freaks and Wufei into Mr. Baby  
  
Kissums.  
  
Wufei: ::calmly:: Call me that one more time and I'm going to dig this sword so far into your brain that you won't be able  
  
to tell the difference between Heero and Relena.  
  
Duo: ::sweatdrop::  
  
Relena: Did someone call me? ::pops into room window with climbing gear and a flame thrower which she used to melt  
  
through the metal blocking the window and spots Heero::  
  
{You couldn't have made a more stupid entrance with a more stupid character}  
  
[::defensive:: She's not really stupid, j-just a l-little u-unique, t- that's all ::keff keff::]  
  
{Unique as in missing about four billion of her most important brain cells}  
  
Relena: ::unhooks herself from the rope and walks up to him, giving him her most winning smile, said climbing gear  
  
moving side to side like a kitten's tail:: Why, hello, Heero. How are you? I haven't seen you since--  
  
Heero: ::spots the window and says suddenly:: There's someone at the door for you.  
  
Relena: ::puzzled:: Really? I wonder who it could be...  
  
Heero: ::glares at Duo and Wufei and hisses quickly:: MOVE! ::all said boys backpedal from the unsuspecting  
  
Peacecraft and begin to jump out of the window one at a time. Suprisingly, Wufei is the first one down::  
  
Wufei: ::opens his arms and grins beatifically:: C'mon, I'll catch you.  
  
Heero: ::stare::  
  
Duo: ::yells:: DOWN BOY! GO HOME NOW, GO ON! SCAT! GO HOME TO YOUR MASTER! YEEEESS,  
  
that's a good, GOOD boy, go to your MAAASTER... ::snickers::  
  
Wufei: ::sniffs and wipes away a tear:: B-But you are my m-master... ::bursts into tears::  
  
{Ain't that freakin' sweet?}  
  
[That's pathetic! ::wrings hands worredly:: Wufei's going to *kill* me after this is over!]  
  
{::ominously:: IF...}  
  
Heero: ::simply:: Duo's your master. ::starts as a chuckle, then escalates into semi-maniacal, not-at-all modestly  
  
hysterical laughter::  
  
[::sighs:: Heero's going to kill me for that too, I can feel it...!]  
  
Duo: ::glares:: Bad boy, BAD BOY!! Go to your room!  
  
Wufei: ::sniffs:: Ok... ::drags himself dejectedly toward the front door. he tries to push it open, then realizes that it's  
  
bolted from the inside:: Hey, I can't. The door is still barred from the inside.  
  
{Oh YEAH, how Gideonly of me! ::furious, uses super Spam powers to zip in, pick up Wufei, put him back up at the  
  
window Duo is about to hurl himself from, shove them inside, and takes ACME(tm) iron window to replace the first  
  
one, pushing and melting it into place:: You're not supposed to get out at all! ::grumbles angrily:: Where's that stupid little  
  
Peacecraft g-- ahh, there she is! ::rubs 'hands' together and giggles maniacally:: You shall... PAY... for almost allowing  
  
my pretty little torture subjects to escape from here! Oh yeessss.... ::melts into little puddle as his brain fizzes and pops  
  
in the deepest concentration::  
  
::gigantic sweatdrop appears at the top of the ficcy world::  
  
::gulp::  
  
::anyway, the present position has Wufei staring dubiously at the window, thinking feverently that the end of the world  
  
must be near, Duo grinning at the iron window, thinking how awesome that was--::  
  
{::momentarily materializes out of puddle:: Why, thank you! ::puddles::}  
  
::...erm, Heero glaring at the window, succeding in leaving minor scorch marks but small nonetheless, Quatre and Trowa  
  
licking thier lips expectantly as the door begins to crack, and Relena, oblivious, opening the door::  
  
Wufei, Duo, Heero: ::all charge for Relena:: NOOO!!! RELENA!!!!  
  
Heero: ::whips out his gun and aims for Relena. he puts it right in her surprised little face. a slow smile cracks his lips::  
  
Mission--  
  
{MINE! MY REVENGE, MINE! ::plucks gun out of Heero's hands:: HA HA! ::again melts into think-Spam-puddle::}  
  
Heero: failed... ::slumps to the ground and looks wide-eyed at his hands:: Mission... failed...?  
  
[::panics:: You devastated him! Spam, that wasn't fair!]  
  
{::gurgle gurgle::}  
  
Duo: ::sighs heavily::  
  
Wufei: Let's just hope that he doesn't do a repeat of that mood he was in after he killed Noventa... ::overcome by pre-  
  
Spam-induced emotion to glomp Heero:: POOR BABY!!! ::wails::  
  
Trieze: ::pops into the center of the room with his aristocratic suit on with cape except with two black 'angel' wings on  
  
his back:: Greetings, oh unfortunate ones.  
  
Zechs: ::pops into the center of the room in awesome set up that he had on the battleship Libra with the exception of  
  
two thin, pretty white angel wings on the back:: Heya dudes, how's it shakin'?  
  
[I didn't do it... Spam didn't do it... ::furious:: so who made him say it?! ::leaves scene to scout of the brain of the  
  
author::]  
  
Duo: ::the only *normal* person there:: What are you doing here?  
  
Treize: ::shrugs elegantly:: We were sent here because somebody pities you uncomparably.  
  
Duo: Who?  
  
Treize: More than likely everyone in the whole ficcy world who ventures to read this pathetic workmanship..  
  
Duo: ::winks at everyone:: Hey!  
  
Relena: My brother.. Zechs, what are you doing here?!  
  
Zechs: ::points to the door:: Check on your callers first...  
  
Duo: No! Quatre and Trowa--  
  
Relena: ::stares:: Are unconsious!  
  
::Quatre and Trowa are, as said, lying on the hallway floor, arms and legs splayed everywhere, big, red wound marks  
  
on thier foreheads::  
  
Quatre and Trowa: MOAN.... MOOOOOOAN....  
  
[::pops up:: You guys are *supposed* to be FRICKIN TIGERS! ::looks closer:: And TROWA! Where are your  
  
EARS!]  
  
Trowa: ::pops awake and quickly puts ears back into place a top his head. shrugs:: Sorry.  
  
[::slumps to the ground:: Ohhhh, my heeeeead.... ::moans::]  
  
Quatre: Erm... MEEEW, MEEEEEEEEEWW...  
  
Trowa: REEEEEOOOOOWWWW...  
  
Wufei: ::rolls his eyes:: This is ridiculous...  
  
Relena: ::bends to examine thier heads:: Why.. they've been knocked in the head! ::she looks closer, particularly on the  
  
tiny imprint in the middle of the red spot on Quatre's head:: It says... 'Most... Psycotic... Japanese C..Character  
  
2000...'  
  
Duo: ::chokes:: Heero's gun. It must have hit them in the head when Spam knocked the gun away from Heero's hands..  
  
Heero: ::static::  
  
Duo: ::grabs Heero and shakes him desperately:: Heero. Heero! HEERO!  
  
Relena: HEE--  
  
Everyone: DON'T EVEN TRY IT!  
  
Heero: ::instantaneously better:: You heard them.  
  
Relena: Eeeep...  
  
Zechs: ::impatiently:: Are any of you ready?  
  
Wufei: ::eyes Treize wearily, who eyes him back:: For what? Why are you here?  
  
Treize: The powers that be wish to give you all an alternate proposition. o- or situation, as you see fit...  
  
::puddle reforms into Spam::  
  
{Proposition?! Will Relena be killed? Will Heero do it? Will DUO do it? Will SPAM do it?! How many freakin parts  
  
does it take to come to a frickin conclusion?! Why the bloody freak is everybody getting killed in 'Elizabeth I'?! Will  
  
Tom, Mike, or Crow EVER show up to shut us down?! Will Trieze MARRY Wufei?! Or DUO?! Or all of them?! Will  
  
Duo rise from the dead?! He's frickin alive, he's frickin aliiiiiii--}  
  
[Hey, I was going to ask you about that!!! Duo didn't die in here! You TOLD me in the beginning that they were getting  
  
ready to kill Duo! Don't you DARE kill my baby!]  
  
Duo: ::face vaults, then manages to say:: Don't *give him any ideas*!  
  
{::slow, creepy silence:: Tune in next time, to "Days of Our Pathetic Gundam Boys Lives"!}  
  
[Waaiiiit a minute... but that's not what the fic's called!!]  
  
{We can only hope....} 


End file.
